September through May.

I'm split into two, but not an even half. I don't know which way I lean, who has the bigger fraction. Stupid thoughts, thoughtless thoughts. I can remember, but hazeily, feel the heat, or maybe I imagined it. I can remember sitting here, the afternoon heat fading into you and the chill of the evening spilling back into me. You woke me up and then I must have drifted off again because I couldn't have been awake this whole time. I've missed too much and you've brought me back out, for all of the wrong reasons yet I'm thankful. It will always be more, but never enough, I love but surely that's not what this is? I'll breathe, it's easier to breathe. There is no platform kisses, there are no kisses at all and that is good. I am in love, but beyond that with you, so far beyond it that I can't even see what it is, so I won't go looking and hope that you'll always be that one step ahead and I'll never have to face this.

o-hi-o.

So, today I was told that I could be jetting off to Ohio in the summer to work for Camp Kirkwood and Conference Center. It is a religious camp, something I have grown increasingly intrested in even though I do not practice any religion. I'd like to learn why people turn to religion, and find the strength in it and not the weakness. I am beside myself with happiness. I get to leave everything behind and know that when I return, I will only have more. Leaving my soul mate behind is an intimidating thought, so I asked him 'Do you love me no matter what?' he replied 'Of course, but I like you depending on what you do'. He made me smile from ear to ear, he wasn't talking about wether I decide to leave him for my dream across the pond for 8 or so weeks - but merely talking about wether I'll let him play on his Playstation until he gets sleepy, or wether I'll let him help me cook. He is the love of all my lives. God bless you, Nick Ferguson.